Four Pillars To A Fulfilling Life P.1

Living a fulfilling life can be a difficult task. Everyone has a different idea of what a fulfilling life consists of.

For me, the ‘rules’ are simple. I like simplification.

When understanding how to live a fulfilling life, I ask myself, “What is the easiest method that I can implement to benefit others and myself?”

I’ve discovered many ‘rules’ to living a fulfilling life. They are broken down into four major categories – Physical, Mental, Emotional, and Spiritual – and they can be easily implemented with minimal effort.

Each of these four are major pillars (struts) holding up the building (your body and mind). Strong building blocks create an unshakeable fortress.

Physical

The physical pillar solely consists of your physical body. People attend school full-time to understand how the body works and how to achieve optimal health.

But as important as school may be, the information is very simple. Being healthy is a simple idea. You don’t need to school to understand how to be healthy.

The common sense approach tells us to treat our bodies with respect.

The process is simple – eat properly, sleep effectively, and move regularly.

Eating a diet of sugar and salt damages our fortress. Eat plenty of greens and drink ample water. Your body needs these things to function optimally.

People claim they can function on 5 hours of sleep, but minimal sleep eventually sneaks up on your body. Your days fly by, as you gloss over them in a sleepy haze. Your fortress needs at least 8 hours to function properly.

People that complain they have low energy or are generally unmotivated usually have desk jobs. A little daily exercise each day alleviates both those problems. You don’t need the gym to be active. Play some sports or go for a walk around your neighbourhood. Your body is not meant to be sedentary for long stretches of time.

When you disrespect your body, sometimes you will feel the effects immediately, like feeling lethargic after too much sugar. Sometimes the effects creep up on you, like progressively getting agitated because of little sleep.

Regardless of the outcome, your body tells you when it needs something. When something is lacking, it fights for it. Sometimes we have to let our bodies win, and eat better, sleep efficiently, and move frequently.

Mental

The mental pillar solely consists of your brain function. Everything you consume – knowledge, information, and news – affects our mental capabilities.

This pillar can also be simplified quite easily. Each day aim to learn something new or build on an existing skill/hobby.

As part of this pillar, I aim to read every single day. Even a few pages makes a difference in the way I feel.

“Poor people have big TVs. Rich people have big libraries.” – Jim Rohn.

What if you don’t like reading? Watch YouTube videos or listen to podcasts and audiobooks. One of my favourite YouTube channels is CrashCourse. The creators provide an overview using cute graphics from a variety of interesting topics.

Lastly, make it a goal to consume less news each day. The news rarely reports anything positive or uplifting. You don’t need the added negativity in your life.

I was going to move to the ‘emotional’ pillar next, but this article is already too long. Instead, I’ll cover the last two pillars next week.

While waiting, aim to improve each of these pillars – physical and mental – by 1% before next week. 1% is doable, right?

Just for this week, eat one extra vegetable per day, sleep an extra 15 minutes, and go for a short walk around your neighbourhood.

Just for this week, learn something that you’ve always wanted to learn, or read a book, listen to an audiobook on your commute, or simply just avoid the news.

These minor improvements compile and eventually you’ve improved significantly over the course of a few weeks.

Be sure to check back next week for the rest of this article.

When every aspect of our lives is clearly defined and progressing, life is easier. When living a fulfilling life, the unintended side effects are happiness and abundance.

Until next time, my beautiful readers,

Be bold, be free, and love on.

The Single Biggest Factor Affecting YOUR Mood

“Are you okay Steven? I can sense something’s wrong.”

I love people who actually pay attention to those around them. They are the best kind of people.

She was right, I wasn’t my usual self. The problem with being energetic and positive all the time is when your mood slips even a little, people notice.

The truth is I had been working two jobs, waking up at 5:45am, working until midnight and doing it again the next day.

Even though everyone knows me as someone who is always happy, it was taking a toll on me and people were noticing.

I used to believe that the ultimate factors dictating my moods were the people and situations around me, now I think in a completely different way.

I like to put my focus towards the factors I can control, while focusing less on the factors that I have less control over.

If you have terrible coworkers, you might be stuck with them. If you have bad in-laws, you’re stuck. A dysfunctional family, good luck because you’re stuck. The weather will be shitty, someone will insult you, and a bird will shit on your head.

That’s life.

So what are the factors affecting your mood that you have control over?

Well, one of the main factors will be our focus for today.

Your Sleep.

It’s not any sort of revelation that sleep affects your mood. There are a ton of studies showing a very strong link between a lack of sleep and increased stress, irritability, anxiety, depression, increased risk of chronic diseases, learning/memory problems and many more disturbing symptoms.

Not only does a lack of sleep increase these symptoms, but it’s been proven that a lot of these symptoms can make it harder to get a good nights sleep. Now that’s a vicious cycle.

We don’t get enough sleep and the crap of the world affects us more, because the crap of the world affects us more, we have a harder time getting to sleep.

Rinse and repeat until you’re having a meltdown because someone cut in line and now you’re that crazy person.

Once I experienced an involuntary ten minute nap between shifts, I knew that I had to fix things.

Here is what we need to do to get our sleep, and our moods, back on track.

See The Light.

Our light consumption throughout the day is one of the biggest factors that affects the quality of our sleep.

Hundreds of years ago when we had little artificial light and relied mostly on the sun, this was not a problem.

These days the sun could go out and no one would even notice. We’d light the skies with our tiny glowing screens. But the problem with these glowing screens is that they produce blue light which messes with your melatonin production.

Your melatonin production regulates your circadian rhythms and lets you body know it’s time to sleep. When you check Facebook right before bed, taking in that blue light, you suppress your melatonin and ruin your sleep before it even starts.

My rules for light consumption are as follows:

• Lots of light in the morning
• No electronics/screens 1 hour before bed
• Have a low light lamp for before bed
• Get blackout curtains

A good general rule to follow is when the sun is up, turn up the lights. When the sun goes down, turn them down. This will help your body develop and maintain a natural circadian rhythm.

Before Bed Foreplay.

You would never just jump into bed with a significant other without building up to it, so why do you just hop into bed and expect a good night sleep?

You need to develop and routine that leads up to your bed time so that your body knows it’s time to count the sheep and sleep away.

This routine should start at least 40 minutes before your bed time, and remember, no electronics.

You can read a little, meditate, have a sleepy time tea, take a shower, brush your teeth, whatever helps your body simmer down and get ready for the sandman. Just don’t drink alcohol too close to bed and don’t exercise too close to bed.

Another thing to include in your routine is the time you go to sleep and wake up. Scientists have found that if you can go to sleep and wake up at roughly the same time at least 6 times a week, you’ll have easier and better quality sleep.

Build a routine, fiddle around with it, and catch those Z’s.

I just woke up from twelve hours of sleep, my body must have really needed that. I feel better than I have in the last week, but it will take a while to get things completely back on track.

There are so many unintended consequences when we don’t give our body the proper sleep it deserves.

It can start with irritability and stress, but over time it can shape our personality, ruin our relationships and take a sledgehammer to our health.

In real life you might have terrible coworkers and a dysfunctional family. Someone might insult you and a bird might shit on your head.

But in your sleep, in your dreams, that’s where it’s decided. That is where you find happiness.

Three Methods To Overcome An Emotional Rut

I’m in physical, spiritual, and emotional distress right now. I had an entire motivational article written for today, but I decided to postpone it.

My body physically aches, my mind drifts to the forgotten past and distant future, and I feel like I’m losing control of my emotions, functioning minimally, as I drift through each day, a hazy blur.

In phases like this, contrary to my better judgment, I tend to focus on what. Now more than ever, I need to reframe my mind towards where. One ‘w’ acknowledges, and the other, directs.

Don’t Ask, “What am I currently focusing on and thinking about?”

We give our brains free-reign over us. Through millions of years of evolution, thoughts are left to the unconscious mind, wantonly unguided. Pondering what, is just being aware of your current thoughts. Being in the present is important but is very different from choosing to direct your mind.

The brain prefers effortless unconscious processes, but it inevitably hinders your progress, pinning everything down. Free-reign over your thoughts destroys your energy.

Thanks evolution.

Instead I have to preemptively battle my thoughts. Asking what emphasizes now, but asking where focuses on the place I want to be. I’m not the pilot now, my brain is. Being in control requires conscious control.

Ask, “Where shall I focus my thoughts right now?”

This forces me to consciously be aware of my thoughts, feelings, and energy. This means being aware of such things and choosing to guide them rather than letting them unconsciously or automatically drive me.

Through conscious awareness I can slowly start to rehabilitate my emotional and spiritual system. I have to refocus my thoughts and actions towards this central goal.

Sleep like a sloth

Recently, I’ve been tremendously lacking in this area. Between work and work and her, sleep is a distant memory. I can feel the effects on my mind. Diminutive sleep pushes your brain into autopilot.

Sloths always seem to have that big goofy smile on their faces. I think it’s because they sleep at least ten hours a day. I have to start carving out time each day for sleep. I have to be as diligent as a sloth.

Appreciate Yourself

We have talked about being grateful for everything around us. Even when things seem bleak, there is always at least one thing to be grateful for. But, we never really focus on ourselves.

I ask myself two questions: “What is my favorite physical aspect about myself? What is my favorite emotional quality about myself?”

When you’re in distress, the only things you focus on are negative aspects. In these moments of turmoil, turn inwards. Discover what you love about yourself. These questions are unbelievably hard to answer. Force yourself to find something.

Tag Someone In

I realized this morning, that I haven’t seen my rocks, my support group, in a long time. Somewhere, between the hustle and bustle of work and life, I forgot to make time for them.

I saw them three times a week forever, but this last little stretch was barren. Today, I saw Steven for the first time in a few weeks. He injected much needed support, positivity and love into my life.

When you’re in need, reach out. Sometimes it’s the only thing that will save you. Your support group is there to help you succeed and live, thrive and prosper. They look out for your best interests.

I practice what I teach and I teach what I practice. Somewhere along the lines I forgot about that. I try to help to as many people as possible through my works, but today, you helped me.

You are part of my extended family. You share my happiness, positivity, zest for life and, inevitably, my pain. Every one of our readers that views, likes, comments, shares, and shows any other form of love, know that I am so appreciative. I know today I will be okay because you are all here for me. I love all of you.

Be bold, be free, and love on.

A Habit of Highly Effective People

People-watching is one of my favorite things to do. It’s a guilty pleasure of mine. As I was taking the bus this morning, I couldn’t help but notice the under-rested student population.

Scores of people yawning, drowsy, passed out and drooling. They’re a complete mess. People do not sleep enough. There, I said it. Someone had to. I feel like it’s something that most people don’t do, but, in my opinion, is so important.

The solution seems so simple to me.

Just sleep more.

People use every excuse in the book. “I don’t have time. I have school! I just can’t sleep!” For me, the solution to all these problems is sleep.

I Don’t Have Time

When I tell people I have a job, a blog, a YouTube channel, and I’m at school full-time, they’re always baffled.

“Where do you find the time? I don’t have the same time you do.”

I do not understand. It seems to me that people think that I somehow have acquired extra time. That’s not the case. I have the same 24 hours that you have.

I appear to have more time because I sleep well. Time seems to be the biggest excuse in everyone’s life. This seems to be the go-to-excuse for most peoples’ problems.

For me, sleep seems to solve the time ‘problem.’ Want to know the secret? I sleep early. Sometimes so early, I can be considered an old man. I sleep early and wake up early.

I (almost) always wake up before the sun. You cannot imagine the amount of things you can accomplish before the sun rises. Everything is quiet and I’m able to finish tasks without any external distractions.

I Have School

Guess what? I also have school. School takes up large portion of my day. Once again, effective sleep is the key. Wake up early! The majority of my daily routine is completed before 8AM.

I give myself an hour after 8AM to focus on school activities. My mornings are efficient because of my previous 8-9 hours of sleep.

Secondly, it allows for better quality work. With adequate sleep, I feel alert and my memory is sharp. Studying is surprisingly easy, when you’re alert and sharp.

I Can’t Sleep

I met this girl who said, “I just can’t sleep. I lay in bed and can’t seem to fall asleep.”

Don’t worry; (unqualified) doctor Leroy is here to diagnose the problem. We talked for a while about her night routine. What she does and when she does it. Here it is:

She is on her cellphone! This just doesn’t make sense. You can’t be on your cellphone AND sleep.

Electronics (i.e. cellphones) produce blue light. Blue light affects your pineal gland (brain) and reduces your ability to produce melatonin.

Melatonin: A chemical in your brain that tells you its time for beddy-bye-bye.

The blue light tricks your brain into thinking it’s still daytime. Your brain says, “Hey, it’s daytime. You don’t need to sleep right now. STOP THE MELATONIN BOYS!”

Avoid all forms of blue light AT LEAST an hour before bed. My method is to read before bedtime.

Cut Out The Unnecessary

Cut out all the wasteful tasks in your day. Do you watch television for longer than you should? Do you putter your time away? Keep a log of everything you do for at least three days.

You will be amazed with the amount of time you waste on frivolous time-wasters.

The Most Effective Habit

Like it or not, sleep is incredibly important for literally everything occurring inside and outside your body. This habit is something most people often sacrifice. For me, sleep is one of the highest priorities.

Sleep combined with a strong daily routine allows for the maximum output of energy and efficiency.

 

 

Challenge: My bedtime is usually at 9:30PM-10PM. Sleep around that time and set an alarm for 6AM. Try this once. After getting your 8 hours, see how you feel in the morning. My bet is that you’ll feel how I feel, great.

Be bold, be free, and love on.

5 Tips for Effective Time-Management

I’ve had this current week completely off. I was working like a madman through the summer and I start school next week. I feel like I deserve a break after all that has happened through the summer.

The problem that has recently occurred to me is that school is starting soon. For many of us, that would seem a joy. For me, it’s terrible. During school, I have zero free time to do all the activities that I hold dear.

Reading, writing, and personal learning almost go out the window. I am most worried about how I will deal with school while juggling my many hobbies and goals.

Here’s what I’ve come up with:

A) Sleep

In my opinion, it’s the cornerstone of everything ‘life.’ Without adequate sleep (I need 9 hours because I’m a hippo), your willpower plummets. You wake up with less willpower resulting in doing less.

Feeling lethargic kisses goodbye your time management skills. You don’t feel like doing much of anything and when you muster up the energy, it isn’t done well.

B) Plan out your day

As part of my daily morning routine, I make a to-do list. I usually do it over breakfast. Planning out the important tasks in the morning allows me to prioritize everything.

I am able to figure out exactly what I want to do during my day and it allows me to manage my time around the list. As an added sense of gratification, crossing something off the list feels amazing.

I recommend implementing a list of important ‘to-do’ tasks everyday. It will allow for better time-management and, as an added plus, will take something off your memory.

C) Cut out the Noise

The people that are closest to me know that I hate texting. I find it completely ineffective for communication purposes past single word answers. Having any sort of conversation via text is completely inefficient and a waste of time.

That being said, texting, to me, is considered noise. Noise is anything that eats away at your valuable time everyday.

This can include Facebook, Twitter, YouTube (unless you’re learning or laughing), Instagram, television, or any other form of media that you can lose yourself in.

Social media is not bad in extremely small doses, but once you start tuning out the world around to tweet, you may have a problem.

I consider everything in this category huge time-wasters that soak up your time like a dry sponge. Try to limit your usage to maximize your time.

D) Have ‘Do Not Disturb’ Time

As most of my frequent readers are aware, I’ve currently undertaken Spanish. I’m slowly discovering that learning a language, as with any learning; takes serious and intense concentration (Check out my article on learning here).

In that regard, you possess the ability to control your environment and its factors. If you have something that requires serious concentration, such as learning a new skill, modify the environment to your needs.

Go to quiet areas, tell friends/family not to bother you for X amount of time, turn off your cellphone, et cetera. This allows you to complete your task in the shortest amount of time possible, freeing up the rest of the time for your other tasks.

E) The List is a Guideline

Sometimes I do not complete everything on my list. Sure, it is disheartening, but it reminds me to properly prioritize everything for the next day.

Use your list as a framework for your day. If you do not complete everything on the list, don’t be discouraged. Aim to cross everything off of that list for the following day.

This Friday, I am embarking on another task. I’ll be launching a business with my mom. This will require a great deal of work and time from myself. Sometimes, I worry if I have too much on my plate.

With my fourth year of school, work, learning, reading, this blog, and that business, how will I ever have the time? Compiling this list brings a sense of ease for me because I know that I will be able to manage everything.

How do you manage your time? Do you have any helpful tips for my readers and I? Please leave a comment in the section below. My readers and I would love to hear from you.

Be bold, be free, and love on.