Shia LaBeouf Says “Stop Giving Up!”

We love motivational videos with a passion. They are a guilty pleasure.

That is why we were ecstatic when we saw that Shia Labeouf had put out a motivational video.

It is to the point and we love it. One of the lines is a classic.

“If you are tired of starting over, stop giving up.”

So, we’re here to explore all the reasons that we might give up, and stop it from happening.

We Expect Results Too Fast

When we first start on a new venture we want everything to work out perfectly. In our mind’s eye we see the stars aligning and all of our dreams coming true overnight, but it never works that way.

The thing is, anything that comes fast, will go just as quickly. Even then, it isn’t what we are getting that is important, it is who we are becoming. And becoming something takes time.

If you aren’t where you want to be yet, it’s because you don’t deserve to be there yet. You haven’t put in the time, the effort, the persistence, or the blood, sweat and tears required. When you deserve the thing you are after, you’ll get it.

So don’t give up.

We Fear The Future

We are terrible predictors of the future.

Think of all the doomsday scenarios that have played out in your head throughout the past. How many of them ended in your life being ruined forever? Probably a lot of them. But right now look around, has your life actually been ruined forever, even once? Probably not.

If you are reading this right now that means that you have internet and probably food and shelter, so it’s safe to say that your doomsday scenarios never came true.

We Dwell On Mistakes

A mistake won’t become a regret unless we fail to learn from it.

That is what mistakes are for. We need to make mistakes so that we can learn and become better. Another word for a collection of mistakes is experience.

We Overwork Ourselves

The religion of hustle and bustle tells us that we have to work 24/7/365 if we want anything in life, but if we don’t have balance we will eventually give up. 

Always remember that there is no finish line. If we want to get in shape and we do all these crazy diets—never eating anything we enjoy and put ourselves through hell—what will happen once we reach our goal?

We will go off the crazy diets, lose all our progress and start again. There is no finish line, once we reach a goal it isn’t “happy ever after,” we have to maintain it. If we reach our goals through means that are not sustainable then we won’t be able to keep what we get.

We Fear Change

If I told you that in fifteen years, you, and your life, would be exactly the same as it is right now how would you feel? Probably pretty crappy. That sounds a little like a nightmare right?

So if that is the case then why are we so afraid of change!?

The fear of change is an immediate fear that we have to confront to conquer, but the fear of staying the same is gradual. The only difference is, when we realize that we are afraid of changing, we can do something about it. But by the time we realize that we’ve stayed the same, we can’t go back.

We Never Visualize What Is Possible

We don’t believe in ourselves, and the reason we don’t believe in ourselves is that we never visualize ourselves conquering our goals.

People say daydreaming is useless but all of the world’s greatest people daydreamed about greatness before they ever made it there. They imagined exactly how it would feel. They saw themselves accomplishing great feats and changing the world.

If we never visualize and put ourselves in that category, that caliber, then we will never believe in ourselves enough to make it. We will doubt ourselves and eventually give up.

Visualize yourself in your greatest state. Visualize the possibilities and don’t worry about the process. Most of the time you figure out the process as you go, but you have to believe that you can reach your goals if you are ever going to start.

So those are the most common reasons why people quit, and why we should never listen to them. Don’t let these fears and anxieties take over your life. If you quit before giving it your best shot, you’ll always regret it.

3 Ways to Optimize Your Life

“Leroy, your article is late. Why?”

I can make all sorts of excuses for why this is late. But I’d like to spare you all the excuses. I don’t like making excuses for my shortcomings. Any sort of rationale I offer will sound like an excuse

“I was busy last night. I couldn’t write. I didn’t have a topic. I wasn’t thinking about it. It slipped my mind.”

All those can be reasonable excuses, but instead I offer an apology. Sorry.

Now that the unpleasant moment is out of the way, I’d like to offer you three ways to optimize your life today.

1) Avoid time travelling

The past problems are behind you. While they may influence who you are and what you stand for, they do not matter. No amount of energy spent can change the past, the relationships, struggles, turmoil and anguish.

Time travelling only has negative effects.

“But Leroy, what if I only think about positive moments?”

Speaking for myself – and I’d like to think it’s the same for the general population – my brain usually focuses on my mistakes/problems. Unless, I focus on the positive in my past, it usually centered on the negative.

Instead, live now. I had a lot of problems in my past, but at this current time, in this current moment, nothing is wrong. That’s a good feeling to have. I have energy, focus and happiness with that thought.

I implore you focus on now.

2) Avoid the news

The news is filled with so much negativity, gossip and drama. Personally, I do not need any extra fuel to my fire. Most news is reported by very bad reporters who are encouraged to use scare tactics to keep you in submission and slavery.

While it is incredibly important to stay informed of current issues, in my opinion, mainstream media is not a suitable outlet. It’s biased and often depicting a one-sided story.

The majority of news is a downer. I propose looking at news from different categories (science, (green) technology, business, etc.) Focus on positive aspects of the news such as breakthroughs.

3) Ask questions

Children have a crap-load of questions. You can assume one of two things: Children are stupid or children are smart.

If you assume children ask a lot of questions because they are stupid and know nothing, I’d like to humbly disagree with you.

I think children ask multiple questions because they know nothing, but want to know more. Questions are the foundation of learning. Questions are how children learn.

As adults, we don’t ask enough questions. As self-entitled adults we think we know it all. We think that help isn’t necessary.

“Everyone you will ever meet, knows something you don’t.” –Bill Nye

Question everyone and listen avidly. Everyone goes through different experiences in their lives and can offer varied responses. I will ask more questions everyday.

There are many other ways to optimize your life. If you want more of this, please leave a comment below and I’ll definitely write another article on it. Additionally, I’d like to invite you to leave specific topics that you would like me to cover for future posts.

Be bold, be free, and love on.

Surprise Guest Post: The Power of Social Anxiety

Morning EVERYONE! I have the pleasure of presenting you with a surprise guest post today! It comes from my friend Rayven who is an incredibly talented writer. She is able to paint a picture in your head with her words (something that I am not so great at). She has an amazing writing style that reaches out to the readers.

Check out her blog at http://moonstruckmicrocosm.wordpress.com for more of her work. She posts everything from personal stories, advice, and poetry! She is very talented, so check her out.

Lastly, my eventual goal for this blog is make it a massive self-help/advice resource for everyone to use. I want more guest posters with unique perspectives on life. If you would like to write on my blog, I would LOVE to have you! Please contact me via Ask a Question page and I would love to hear some of your ideas.

So without further ado, I present to you her article!

Social anxiety became the friend I always needed.

Frustration lingering in the air,
tastes bitter but I cannot sweeten it with my voice.
The perception of reality dissolves around me,
and I become trapped within myself.

For a time, writing was the only thing that made me feel heard. It was the only time I wasn’t afraid to speak. I mean really speak. I was silenced everywhere else, and the worst part about the silence was that it was predominantly caused by an internal source.

I couldn’t be myself; I was trapped in a cloud of anxiety, constantly worrying.

Social anxiety (or social phobia) made me afraid to be who I was, even to people I had known for years. The crippling doubt and fear I felt when I tried to speak was enough to keep me curled up and hiding within myself.

On the outside I was smiling, but self-hatred was swimming around in my head.

Being shy meant needing a bit more time to adjust; having social anxiety meant adjusting was not an option.

Blushing, heart palpitations, tunnel vision, sweating, dry mouth, and more would be a constant reminder of how incapable I was. If I knew I had to talk about something, I would spend hours rehearsing what I was going to say. After the conversations, I would painfully replay them in my head, picking them apart and berating myself for every mistake I thought I had made.

And I always walked away from interactions thinking I looked a fool.

Luckily, social anxiety is not who I am. It’s not who anyone is. We so often attribute the flaws in ourselves to who we are as people, but that is not the case.

After struggling for years and after my doctor convinced me I had to seek help for myself, I sought a therapist through my university. I was lucky to have her as my guiding light. I set myself free in that room and it seeped into everyday life.

Social anxiety became a challenge rather than an inherent part of who I was. By seeing it as external I could fight it without shaming myself in the process. The burning in my face when I spoke in class was a source of pride rather than humiliation, because it meant I was dealing with it rather than letting it hold me back.

I still struggle with it sometimes, but I am a much more confident person and the progress I have made keeps me fighting.

You are not your depression, or your anxiety, or anything else that seeks to suppress you. Think of them as friends who need love and care, as you do. Embrace them and accept them, help them rise above, but always allow for mistakes.

Mistakes lead to lessons. Each time you try, whether it leads to success or failure, you are laying down a new brick in your path. You are always making progress, just be sure to fight for the progress you want.

Leap of the Edge

My fears have controlled me for far too long. I let them take over and consume me. Change me into something I do not want to be. I am fearful of failure and judgments, fearful of girls and fearful of the future, to name a few.

Overcoming fear is a hard task. I am scared because I want to be scared. Thinking of all the past moments, my body trembles and my brain delves into multiple terrible scenarios.

Leap. Don’t think about it too much.

Just do it. Jump. Jump of the cliff. I’ve always loved the way cartoon characters run right off cliffs, then look down for a hapless frozen moment before plummeting into the abyss.

That is the boldness I need. That is the strength I need. Slowly, I will build it. Slowly, I will continue to improve.

A) Fearful of Failure and Judgments

I have a gut-wrenching fear of starting something just to have it crash and burn. Everyone will watch it happen. Everyone will watch me crash like the countless people who tried to fly before the Wright Brothers.

Leap. Don’t think about it too much.

I started a YouTube channel (2HelpfulGuys). I am a terrible actor, but I tried it. I leaped into the abyss. It was terrifying, but fun. I felt a thrill, a thrill I have never felt before.

I got compliments, instead of judgments. It was endearing. I also got two ‘Thumbs Down’ on the video. It hurt for a second, but those people do not matter. There will always be naysayers in your life. There will always be people that will try to push you down, keep you at their level. Ignore them they do not matter.

B) Fearful of Girls

Recently, I feel like I have written about girls a lot. There is a reason, I will elaborate later. But, I feel like I will never understand girls. Yet, I love them. They keep on my toes, push me to limits and challenge me.

Leap. Don’t think about it too much.

Recently, one girl in particular made me leap. I jumped off that cliff, burst my protective bubble and showed her a glimpse of what ‘Leroy’ is.

I crashed and burned. But, that is okay. I did it. I leaped. I opened myself up. I shared. I explored. I laughed. I smiled. I learned.

I learned something incredibly valuable. Sometimes, you need to crash and burn. You need to make mistakes. The leap was more satisfying than I could have ever dreamt off. It shadowed the minor failure. It is okay to crash and burn.

I feel like there are ill feelings between the two of us. I hope I am wrong.

C) Fearful of the Future

I have so many goals for myself. Sometimes, I think they are unrealistic, but that is not the right attitude. I can achieve anything that I want. I know I can. You can achieve anything you want. It’s important to believe that.

A wise friend explained to me that there are three different types of people in California:

1) The person that goes and falls flat and fails,

2) The person that goes and barely scrapes by, and

3) The person that goes and makes it big

Why am I mentioning this? Well, my best friend and I are planning on moving to California as early as January 2016. I do not want to fall in the first two categories. I am deathly afraid of the future.

Leap. Don’t think about it too much.

Still, I must go. I must prove something to myself. This will be the biggest leap I will have to make. This will be a life-changing leap. You cannot be afraid of the future. Being afraid will continue to hinder your abilities and aspirations.

Leaps of faith are necessary to learn, grow and change. They are needed to progress and evolve.

For me, even publically stating my fears is a leap of faith. Do it now. I did it. You have to. List your fears. But remember,

Leap. Don’t think about it too much.

The Power of Mistakes

Recently, I was terrified of losing my job. I did something bad and I had terrible thoughts racing through my head.

“How would I pay my bills? What am I going to do without money? How the hell am I supposed to survive? No one is hiring anymore.”

I’ve made a lot of mistakes in my life. Do I regret them? No. Definitely not. My mistakes have made me who I am. They have made me stronger, better, and faster. I am pretty much the three million dollar man, minus the three million dollars.

With every mistake that I make, I discover more about myself. About who I am, my limits, capabilities, and what I can and cannot do. They help me become a more compassionate and tolerant person, not only to others, but also with myself.

Mistakes Are ALRIGHT.

You can learn valuable life lessons from every mistake. Do not let that mistake go in vain. Learn, progress and strive for something better.

I will never make the same mistake at work again. I cannot afford to. I do not want to relive that brief moment, where I had fears of losing my livelihood.

There is so much we can learn from our mistakes, and the moment we see them as lessons rather than mistakes, we will no longer possess this irrational fear of encountering them.

“To Err is Human” – Alexander Pope

Mistakes are a part of being human. Appreciate your mistakes for what they are. They are integral to building a better you.

Don’t Be Afraid of Mistakes

It is interesting that mistakes are something that everyone does, but most people are afraid of them. They are afraid of failing, screwing up or disappointing someone. Sometimes, I am afraid.

But, rise above it. You have to. No, you need to. If you play it safe, stay in your comfort zone, your life will be a full basket of regrets. You will have more regrets about the things you did not do rather than the things you did do, you will regret not making more mistakes.

When I started working out, I was timid. I was afraid of what people might think.

“Who is this fat kid? What is he trying to do? He looks so stupid right now.”

I could not get over the hump of the judgmental stares. I limited myself to certain activities to avoid ridicule. I was afraid of trying new things because people would laugh if I made mistakes.

In most cases, your mistakes only matter to you. In the brevity of human life, mistakes do not matter.

One thing I learned from working out is that people are generally self-absorbed and not looking (or even caring) about you. Those stares were all in my head. I was self-conscious and let the fear of making mistakes hinder my abilities.

Failure is Necessary

In order to succeed, you must fail. You must fail consistently, for a long period of time. Falling flat on your face is the best motivator.

Recently, a friend and I started a YouTube channel (2HelpfulGuys). Check it you when you have a chance.

He is a great actor. I am not amazing, myself. I make the same mistakes, over and over and over again.

I cannot seem to wrap my head around certain lines. The bloopers are almost endless, as I struggle to achieve a few good takes. But making the same mistakes repeatedly, I slowly learn.

Accept the mistakes and move on.

I gain and hone the abilities, one at a time. Eventually, I will be able to limit the bloopers. I will progress and achieve my goals.

But, it has to stem from my mistakes.