Two Little Letters That WILL Change Your Life

Today is my third day of the last semester of my school career. If you have been with us since the beginning, you know of my complete disdain for school.

You’ve probably read some of our earlier articles on perseverance and living for yourself. With the culmination of school becoming an approaching reality, my body is becoming more energized, happier, and fulfilled.

Finally I can pursue my dreams, my goals and my aspirations.

The last four years have felt like someone has been controlling my life. I feel like a helpless puppet, played with and strung along this path. I’m not pointing fingers, but I am here because someone insisted I get an education.

Maybe you don’t want to go to school, but someone is forcing you

In the ever-changing world, school has become less of a requirement. Unless you hope to become a doctor or lawyer, school is becoming increasingly pointless.

But they keep forcing their opinions on you. They keep insisting you get a quality education, but shrug the horrendous amount of debt that looms over your head.

Maybe you want to leave your job, but you feel obligated to stay

You have obligations to your co-workers, family and friends. They are controlling you, keeping you in the same place, demanding your attention and valuable life.

Because of your obligations, you can’t see a way out. You decide to stay, despite your better judgment, living someone else’s expectations for your life. You feel trapped in the same place, stuck for perpetuity.

Maybe you want to learn something, but people beat you down

You crave a new skill, but people say, ‘That’s a far-fetched idea. You’ll never make it.’ You absorb this negative feedback and internalize it.

You give up your zest for learning or trying because others have said you couldn’t do it. Before long, you’re stuck, again, in your cyclical life.

When I wanted to learn politics, I faced opposition from all sides. I wanted to change the world positively. Most people told me I was crazy, that it would never work. I gave up.

The Solution is a Powerful Two-Letter Word

The word no is one of the simplest words in the English language, but it possesses significant power. We don’t exercise no as often as we’d like. We might disappoint people.

But your sanity and life depends on those two little letters. When you say yes to someone, you inherit all of their expectations, requirements and burdens. We can’t solve all the problems of the world without taking care of ourselves first.

Say no when someone thinks they know you better than you. Say no to people who feel like school is the best decision for your life.

Of course, we have those obligations to our families. But say no, by finding another solution while you’re in your current job. Say no to the slavery of your 9-5 if it doesn’t satisfy you. Seek solutions.

Say no to negative people and dream crushers. Say no to people that think you’re crazy, stupid, or foolhardy.

Maybe if I rejected all the dream-crushers during my political phase, I could have changed the world. But I gave up because I forgot to say no. But, then again, I’m trying to change the world now. This time, in a different way.

Be bold, be free, and love on.

4 Steps For A Successful ‘New Year, New Me’ Mentality

Tomorrow is my birthday. I’ll be hitting twenty-four. Coincidentally, it’s also the New-Year. So today, I will be reflecting on my year of life. It has been an interesting journey.

A year ago, I didn’t have anything. This blog, the YouTube channel, all the lovely readers, the confidence, the support and love, were all missing from my life. I was a wandering soul, trying to figure out my purpose.

My conscious goal was to figure out my life and in March 2014, I found solace in helping people. With each article, I felt a sense of satisfaction. My purpose became clearer, more refined.

Starting a New Year is interesting for many reasons. Among the sea of ‘New Year, New Me’ people there are a few that prosper. My goal is to increase that few from a hypothetical 10 out of 100, to a hypothetical 90 out of 100. Reaching everyone is foolhardy, but I can definitely increase that number a little bit.

Here’s what I’m going to do tomorrow.

Scratch that. I’m starting today.

1) A New Habit

Aside from the core habits – sleep, diet and exercise – there are many others you can implement. I’m solidifying an older routine into my daily practice: 10-minute meditations.

We’ve talked about meditations in the past, but humor me for a second. Your brain is the central entity responsible for all your thoughts, feelings and actions. It is responsible for everything; consciously and unconsciously in your body, yet we allow no rest.

When was the last time you did nothing – no thinking, worrying, fiddling? Your answer, like mine, is probably never. You have 10 minutes a day to dedicate to nothing.

Set a timer and focus on breathing. The hardest thing isn’t finding the time, but sitting still for 10 long minutes. It will be hard, but the more you do, the more benefits you reap and the practice becomes easier.

2) Determining Your Landmarks

I’m already one semester closer to graduating. What seemed like an eternity in September has passed and April is on the horizon. Time has a way of rapidly passing if you don’t monitor it.

Today, consciously think about where you want to be in 1 month, 3 months, 6 months and 1 year. How do you want to feel physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally at those landmarks?

Decide the method you’re going to implement to feel that particular way. Write them down; post them somewhere visible, somewhere significant to you, as a reminder.

3) Live Fully Through Your Landmarks

Aim to improve insignificantly each day with your landmarks in the forefront of my mind. Improving yourself by 1% each day is insignificant, but that’s all you need.

Don’t try and climb your mountains everyday. Instead, take three steps and rest. At the end of year, you’ve improved 365% and you’re at the top of the mountain, well rested, stress free, and happy.

4) Reevaluate

Businesses release their results quarterly to show their progress, strengths and weaknesses and general hiccups. Become a major business. Every three months, revaluate your life.

The questions I ask myself:

  • Have I been living congruently through my landmarks?
  • Am I fulfilled with all aspects of my life? If yes, continue on your path. If no:
  • What can I do to reevaluate and reinvigorate to achieve my next landmark?

Take time each quarter to assess your progress, your strengths and weaknesses and your hiccups. “Where am I faltering? Where can I improve? What is the biggest thing holding me back from achieving my goals?” are all questions you can ask yourself multiple times a year.

This year, like last year, will be tremendously different, if I allow it to be. If I implement this four-step method, I know I won’t be one of the ‘new year, new me’ people that fail and ponder what went wrong at the end of 2015. I hope you implement these methods and questions. If you do, 2015 will be your year.

Be bold, be free, and love on.

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How To Get ANY Job…Unconventionally.

Last Wednesday I accidentally got a job. I was going into this chocolate store and before I knew it, they were interviewing me. I wasn’t even slightly prepared.

I haven’t job ‘hunted’ in a while, but recently some of friends were complaining that no one was hiring.

Yet, they REALLY wanted me. They were trying to sell me the job! The whole thing was surreal. How did I do it? Not sure, but here’s what I came up with:

A) Confidence 

I feel like it all starts here. This is the determining factor for almost everything in life. You need to be confident when approaching your future employer. When I approached them, I remember saying, ‘I will be the best employee you’ve ever hired.’

People respond to confidence. So few people are confident, that when it’s demonstrated, it comes off as a shock.

A few tips to confidence: look at them in the eyes as you sell yourself. Acknowledge what they said and respond concisely. Use open body language (Google it).

Active conversation comes with confidence. When you are confident, you are attentive and sharp.

B) You are human and guess what… 

So are they. We are all the same mouth-breathing, pooping disgusting people with pretty little masks on.

Treat them as such. Do not place them above yourself. You may think that because you are asking for a job and they get to decide, that puts them above you.

Well, it doesn’t.

Before you approach them, remember that they’re just like you. Treat them as such. Treat them like you’re trying to befriend someone for the first time. Aim for that balance between playfulness and seriousness.

C) Be Yourself 

Even complete strangers can pick up on your façades. Your masks will only hurt you when you approach. Being your genuine self allows people to see your true personality.

And, if by some divine luck, you managed to snake past the interview wearing your mask; your co-workers will eventually see who you really are. Save yourself the embarrassment and be genuine.

D) Make Them Laugh 

In the dating world, the top quality that women look for in a man is ‘funny.’ Not rich, happy, or successful but funny. There has to be some validity to that.

The manager that you’re talking to also loves to laugh! So make him/her laugh. Swear if you must. What I said was, ‘excuse my language, but shitty customers are just that, shitty.’ They laughed.

Swear only if you absolutely have to, but use the ‘excuse my language’ precursor. It seemed to work for me.

Laughter is the way to anyone’s heart. It’s proven. Look at all those dating sites.

E) Show Value 

The best question that is asked in all interviews is, ‘what can you bring to the table?’ I love this question because I can say literally say anything to win them over.

In this particular case, I said, ‘my knowledge.’

“Everyone you will ever meet, knows something you don’t” – Bill Nye

That reminds me that I know a lot of things that the employer doesn’t know. I can use my own knowledge to sell that. I used my knowledge of psychology to teach them something.

You know a lot of things that your future employer doesn’t know either. Use it. Teach them something. They will listen and they will love you.

F) Rules of the Game 

I don’t think there are any rules to this game. Too many people subscribe to the rules and let opportunities pass them by. We’re told to say certain things and act a certain way.

‘Sticky’ questions like ‘what do you pay’ and ‘what can you, as the employer, offer me’ are off the table for most. For me, they aren’t. When you ask the employer, what they have to offer YOU, it’s like their trying to sell you the job.

The roles are reversed. You’re really interviewing them, but they don’t know that.

I think rules are meant to be broken. These tips are all unconventional and this article has gone on too long. As a later point, I will make a part II. For now, go forth and get any YOU desire…unconventionally.

Be bold, be free, and love on.

 

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