The Truth About Lying.

It seems as if we live in a world of lies. Nearly every adult will tell you that lying is wrong. But when it comes to avoiding trouble, saving face in front of the boss, or sparing someone’s feelings, many people find themselves doing it anyway. Sometimes, I lie because I just feel the need too.

It can be something stupid like my height. But still, I don’t quite understand why? I have nothing to gain from it and I am sure people catch me knee deep in it.

Eventually, you are forced to lie because you previously lied and it continues to grow. No matter how small the lie is, it always chips away at relationships.

I’ve referred to my past relationships a lot, but it is all too clear the life I’ve led. The most significant relationship I’ve ever had was riddled with lies. There was not a shred of truth in her and I was too oblivious to see it.

Or maybe, I just did not want to see it. Regardless, it crippled me inside.


I’ve complied the three types of lies in this world and why it is necessary to stop.

A) White Lies

I suppose to most of you, these are considered the least harmful of all lies, hence the ‘White.’ But I do not believe that at all. White lies destroys relationships. It usually starts with a simple lie.

“That fish was 10 feet long. No, those tight pants fit you great.”

When these white lies compound and are used excessively, it can make your interactions less authentic. At its worst, people will get the notion that you are not being genuine and, eventually, they will begin lose trust.

I have no verbal filter. Some people are afflicted with this occasionally. For me, it is literally all the time. I constantly have to censor myself around new people or risk losing relationships.

But I feel that being genuine is integral to building lasting relationships. White lies (lying to spare ones’ feelings or being brutally honest to hurt ones’ feelings) can be avoided but toning it down. Tell the truth but provide reasoning and positive feedback as well.

Some people will take offence, but it is always followed by acceptance and endearing responses.

B) Lying to Avoid Situations

We often find ourselves in less than desired situations. Situations like meetings, soirées, and general gatherings. What happens? We fib to get out of it.

“I can’t go out. My cat died. I have homework. A dingo ate my baby.”

Well, maybe, not so much the last lie. Instead, I propose saying “No.” Try it; exercise the power of “No.” Fine-tune the word “No” and use it in your everyday life.

You can use it with any and every situation you encounter and avoid the traps that will occur if you originally lied. Stop trying to justify the reason you give the recipient and end it with a simple “no.”

C) Lying To Yourself

Out of all three, I feel like this is the most common lie among us. We lie to ourselves constantly, everyday. This is the most destructive to us. Eventually, we start internalizing it, believing it and it becomes second nature.

“I do not have a drinking problem. I do not need therapy. I am not fat.”

Lies prevent you from realizing your faults and progressing. You internalize your problems as normal and forget that they are problems. With the exception of “I am not fat” these lies are all incredibly harmful.

Body image is incredibly skewed in society. As long as you are living a healthy lifestyle, words like “fat, skinny, large, toothpick” can be eliminated from your dictionary.

Whatever you want to accomplish, from sticking to a healthy lifestyle to conquering your drinking problem, lying about what is really going on puts you one step farther from that objective.

Instead, visualize, in full detail, what it would feel, sound, and smell like to attain your goal. Construct a picture in your head, already attaining that goal.

Lying is incredibly damaging to your relationships. I suppose, I do not have to stress that. Anyone that has lived has lied and hurt people. But this is not the life I want to lead.

I want to be known as genuine and trustworthy and it all starts with the truth.


I went to a social gathering this past weekend and was called a quasi-hipster. After looking up what all those words meant, I am still very confused. I simply do not understand how or what makes a quasi-hipster.

Regardless of the matter, it started to make me think of body image. We get wrapped up in all these different styles and labels that we end up losing our individuality and, inevitably, ourselves. I am incredibly guilty of this.

I have changed my physical self more times than I can count. I used to be overweight and unhealthy. I’ve had multiple hairstyles. I’ve changed my clothing style. What more can I really change? What makes me constantly want to change?

The Media

I feel like people are not happy with who they are. Media destroys who you are and implants ideas of who you are supposed to be.

But those images are terrible for you. Avoiding media is an integral step. How? Media is literally everywhere. It’s impossible. Instead, limit your consumption. You can choose to avoid television or that specific image magazine. Reducing your consumption will decrease the thoughts about it.

When your heads soaks up these false body images it takes a toll on your brain. When I was younger, I used to look at fitness magazines, religiously. I have wanted a six-pack so badly. But, why? I felt a six-pack would complete me. But would a six-pack make me happy? Make me feel whole?

The short answer is no. I have realized that now. I don’t need a six-pack to be whole. I am great the way I am. So are you. A six-pack is a want. Attaining it or not will not change who I truly am. That is a mere want, not a need.

The Goals

It’s not that you can never attain your ideal body. I truly believe you can accomplish anything you want. But why change who you are? You are simply perfect the way you are.

Getting wrapped up in these ideals ruins your potential. Instead, believe that you are different and awesome. Attain inner happiness first. Be happy with yourself, for yourself. On those particularly bad days, write down all the goods things about you.


Here’s some help: I like my determination, personality, and persistence. I think I have nice eyes and a hell of a smile. My hair is ragged most days, but when it co-operates, it works out quite well.

It’s always good to have a goal. But do not let that goal take over. When it comes to body image, I like to imagine myself a certain way. Then I image my life after I look this way. In my visualization, my life never changes significantly.

Regrettably, I still do not have six-pack. But this doesn’t change me. This does not make me less of a person. What makes me less of a person is wallowing in my despair over a lack of a ‘perfect’ body. One day, I will reach that goal, but until then, I am quite happy with myself.

“To lose confidence in one’s body is to lose confidence in oneself.” – Simone de Beauvoir

Still though, I can’t help but feel weird. When I was younger, comments on my body image used to bother me, a lot. However, it does not have the same effect on me. So why is this time any different? But why does this one make me think? I still don’t know. I don’t have all the answers. But what I do know, is that I am awesome and so are you.